Farting In The Face Of Sex

If I were a gorgeous model or movie star, I’m sure I would never fart. I would also never piss, shit, vomit, or bleed from the crotch because nothing more offensive than a ray of sunshine would ever come out of my body. As a normal person, I am forced to acknowledge not-so-sexy things like cellulite and queefing. Which brings me to confession time.

My name is Vix, and I am haunted by the need to fart during sex.

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humor
I just threw up in my mouth a little
sex ed.

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A Sexy Smile From Cabo

I am long overdue for showing a photo as part of the “buy crap off my sidebar please” incentive policy. For new readers, for every $150 I make from commissions for IntimateGifts.com, Undercovercondoms.com, Chemistry.com, Amazon.com, I will post one sexy photo. There are no head shots (so I don’t get my ass fired) and nothing x-rated (so I don’t get any creepy propositions (although if you would like to submit a formal proposition, please use the following application)).

As you know, I went to Mexico recently. Here’s a photo The Marine took of me while I was lying in the pool:

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18+ Only Please

I'm Vix, a 28 year-old Texan. After 18 years of private education and 3 degrees, I'm trying to leave the corporate world behind to become a sex/humor writer and novelist. I'm sexy, funny, ugly, raw, and entirely real-- because there's more to me than being a blowjob queen.

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