{ 08 26 2008 }

Slipping By

When we were flying back from Mexico last week, I sat by the window and read a book I had borrowed from Favorite Coworker. As I flipped to a new page I found a note tucked away between the pages. You’re going to be my wife!! I love you XOXO. It must have been from Favorite Coworker’s new husband when they were still engaged.

I touched the note with the tip of my finger and smiled. It warmed my heart.

With the book still open in my lap I peered out the window of the airplane. I have always loved taking the window seat on flights, especially on long trips when you can watch the land change in color and terrain. The Marine had scoffed when it became apparent that I had assumed he would let me have the window seat on all four of our flights. On the outside I graciously offered to flip seats every other flight, but on the inside I pouted. The little girl in me didn’t want to share.

I watched the land slowly slip by thousands of feet below us. I stared out the window with the same wonderment I have had every time I’m in an airplane since I was a child. It amazed me that we were up here in a tiny little aircraft zipping across thousands of miles of land as if it’s no big deal. This view is probably something I will never see again. I will take many more trips in my life, and they will all be different. Sometimes I will see mountains, other times hills or plains or nothing but miles of ocean in every direction. The colors of the earth will change and I will get to see it from miles above. It is remarkable that people are able to experience this across the world every single day, and today I am lucky enough to be one of them.

As I turned my attention back to the book, my thoughts returned to the note I had found. I studied the curves of the lettering, the slant of the words across the torn piece of paper. I flipped it over. Why, in case there’s a secret to love written on the backside? My eyes teared up. I want that. I want someone who will write sweet little things like that for me one day, and when I discover one I will smile because I will know that I got it right.

I looked over at The Marine next to me. With every part of my body I felt a simple No.

Sure he’s nice and sweet and fun to fuck, but no. Just no. There is affection, but there is no love or future here.

I turned my head back toward the window. The land passed beneath us slowly. I wondered if we were still in Mexico or had crossed the Texas border yet. Everything looked so much prettier from this distance. I wished I could stay there forever, but you can only watch life slip by for so long.

One day I’ll get there. I sighed, and turned the page in my book.

____________
Continue reading about The Marine here.

Posted by Over Educated Nympho on Tuesday, August 26th, 2008, at 3:39 am, and filed under life, love, brooding.

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