Sorry Mom, Can’t Play Monopoly Tonight Because I Have To Shave My Crotch
Last week my parents decreed that Saturday be a family day. This wouldn’t be a big deal if my brothers and I didn’t live all over Texas, which is one big-ass fucking state. We are all driving to the city where Big-Little Brother lives and spending the day together. It would be as lovely as a field of sequin-covered leprechauns except for the fact that I’M TRYING TO GET LAID. Tonight, specifically.
It has been seven months of diddly fucking squat plus two weeks of playful teasing, and I refuse to let a game of Monopoly with my family jeopardize my shot at multiple orgasms with a guy whose tongue is capable of uncanny ability.
