Still a Lifer
I’ve always known that I would probably be on anti-depressants for life. Depression (and AD(H)D as I later found out) both run in the family, depression on both sides. Fantittyfuckingtastic. At least I’m not an alcoholic like everyone in my dad’s family!
I’ve been on meds since I was a sophomore in college. The depression was really bad for years and only recently let up. Even the low days are not nearly as low as they used to be. Stupid me, when my prescription for anti-depressants ran out, I thought (just a little!) that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if I went off them for a while… I’ve been doing so much better lately…
For being such a clever girl, I make some really stupid decisions. What, did I think that wishful thinking would bitchslap my biochemistry into having a happy face? Now my biochemistry is glaring back at me with her hands on her hips going NEENER NEENER NEEEEENER you can’t beat me!
Bitch. Them’s fighin’ words. Okay obviously I would lose but at least throwing some punches would make me feel better.
