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I’d Rather Be Dreaming About Dick

It’s midnight and I just got home from the office. Today has been miserable, and not just because I was too busy being a good little worker monkey to bask in the triumphant opening of flood gates last night. The last two days have been rough at the office and I’ve barely gotten any sleep since Thursday night (over the weekend I stayed up late exchanging naughty IMs with my lust-interest while at my parents house! GO ME).

About half the time I can remember my dreams from the night before. I’d say 75% of them are work-related. Doesn’t matter if I spent the entire evening writing about blowjobs, I will dream about being a cubicle monkey.

Listen up, brain–you’re going to ignore everything you did at the office today and THINK ABOUT THE COCK YOU HAD IN YOUR MOUTH LAST NIGHT. IS THAT SO FREAKING HARD? WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DREAM ABOUT WORK INSTEAD OF COCK? SHAME ON YOU. SHAAAAAME. IF YOU DREAM ABOUT WORK AGAIN AFTER HAVING GOTTEN LAID, THEN YOU CAN JUST GO FUCK YOURSELF ON YOUR PRECIOUS DESK CHAIR, OKAY ASSWIPE?

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My Psyche is Haunting Me

I know all you pervy readers want the dirty details of last night, but I can’t make any promises–I’m home for an hour to eat and re-Vixenize before going back to the office to get stuff ready for a huge meeting on Friday.

In addition to getting laid last night (BOOYAH MOTHAFUCKAS), there is much to spill about all those other things in my life now that the quest for cock (cockquest? anyone think that’s as funny as me? no? okay then, suck it) has calmed The Pussy down. In other words, there are things haunting my mind that are distracting from the post-sex glow of triumph.

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A.D.D.
brooding

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The Pussy Is Pleased

The dreaded drought is over. I’m no longer counting in months, but hours.

Damn I feel so much better. I may even smile at work tomorrow. Or at least stop hissing.

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*18+ Only Please*

I'm Vix, a 27 year-old Texan. After 18 years of private education and 3 degrees, I'm trying to leave the corporate world behind to become a sex/humor writer and novelist. I'm sexy, funny, ugly, raw, and entirely real-- because there's more to me than being a blowjob queen.

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